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Self-Indulgence

I drink tea. I drink a lot of tea. So I have a dedicated electric water boiling pot. My old one broke, and I got a new one. The problem is the new one has 4 buttons on it, and a temperature gauge. Do I need water that is 177 degrees? My old boiling pot had a single lever switch: you push it down, and when the water is boiling, it turns off automatically. The new one requires that you push several buttons before the damn thing works. So, being self-indulgent, I went...

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Clean Your Gear

I see a lot of gear. It gets sent to me, or I visit someone's studio, or whatever. It never fails to astound me how people mistreat their beautiful equipment. I just cannot understand it. When I get a piece of gear, the very first thing I do is wipe down the front panel with a damp cloth. You should see what comes off! Yecch … Now, not only do I object to this on a purely aesthetic level, because clean gear is often lovely, whereas gross dirty scummy gear is just butt...

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Use A Damned Windscreen!

“I don’t like the way windscreens change the sound”....Seriously? Speaking strictly from technical jargon, exactly what frequencys does a typical nylon pop filter or windscreen affect? I gotta tell you, I think we are talking way way way up there...BUT in any case, you still need to use a wind screen, and here's why: because you actually like that expensive condenser microphone and you want it to continue to work up to snuff.    That's why! Whats with screening the...

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“Everything I Buy Is Mint Until It Arrives”

"It's all original" "it was all working when we took it out of service" "it doesn't need a neck reset" "The diaphram looks good" "The finish is original" "My tech just went through it" "My Dad (Grandfather, Uncle, Aunt, Cousin, etc) told my brother he bought it new in 1936 (1920, 1942, 1955, etc.)" "This Epiphone (Fender, Gibson, etc) was made in America" "I packed it really well" "The frets are in perfect condition" If a child age 8 years or younger has had one dose...

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Assistant Engineering: A Stiff Dose of Reality

TURN OFF YOUR PHONE!! I do not mean set it to vibrate! No texting, no phone interaction whatsoever. An Assistant Engineer never volunteers an opinion to the Artist or the Producer (ever!). You will be far better off to say "I don't know" if asked, even when you have a clear and strong opinion. The Assistant Engineer exists to make the Engineer look good, even when you think they are making a mistake. If you see a piece of gear that the Engineer had adjusted improperly,...

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Giant Microphone Stands

So. You took the plunge, and purchased a big heavy expensive condenser microphone. It cost as much as your car, maybe. So how do you feel about putting it on one of your standard mic stands? The ones you buy at the music store? What if someone knocks your sizeable investment over and breaks it in one way or another? What you need is a real microphone stand! Three companies made microphone stands that are nearly impossible to tip over: Starbird, RCA, and...

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How to pack, move, tune, and clean an EMT Plate Reverb

HOW TO PACK AN EMT 140 PLATE REVERB FOR SHIPPING After damaging 14 of 21 plate reverbs that I bought from CBS in NY, in 1983 or so, I devised this packing method. It has proven to be very effective. However, no packing job can stand up to the determined assault of a rabid forklift! The main problem in moving plates is that when a unit is dropped, the plate falls and breaks the little springs and clips that hold it onto the frame. When the plate falls, it shears off the...

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How to Pack a Guitar for Shipping

Packing a guitar for shipping requires a few essential items, and a bit of work if one actually wants the instrument to arrive without damage. Here is the method I have developed over the last 15 years. In that time I have shipped Many nice instruments, only a couple of which sustained any damage. In those instances, the damage was due to my own incompetency, or stupidity as the case may be. It is certainly highly preferable for the guitar to ship within a hardshell...

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Funny Stories

Funny Stories Here’s one for you….guy called me one time looking for a driver magnet for an EMT, because his ex took it when she left….can you picture her removing the side in order to get at it? The “creative moment” has always seemed magical to me. I don’t know where songs come from. Sometimes they seem to simply appear. I know John Seabury as a member of the Psycotic Pineapple, a local Berkeley group that I had the pleasure of producing in the late 70’s. He is also...

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